Last
The one word I hate these days is "last." While talking about Spring Fest, I had to say the "last" Spring Fest. The photos I've been taking on campus are my "last" photos. The e-mails coming from professors end with sentences that include sayings like our "'last'" days of classes. I've been going to my "last" lectures, having my "last" waffles from Mozart and seeing people I know, maybe for the "last" time, and this makes me upset.
Older people will often say that time flies by so quickly. To them, we should appreciate our university years as much as possible. I hate clichés like that. I used to listen, and give a polite nod while thinking, "What are you talking about? I have to earn over 150 credits and endure sleepless nights with all of these projects, quizzes, presentations, homework and you're still saying that I should enjoy? No, I am not such a masochist." What I see now is that I was wrong! I am - or at least have become - a masochist. I started to like writing reports at the last minute, preparing presentations through out the night, discussing lectures even while having dinner, asking my friends about homework, writing only my name on a quiz and still getting some points. I just want to go back to being a freshman instead of being a senior. It is annoying to be a grown up and to call my friends colleagues instead of school mates. I still have things to do at Bilkent and graduating is the last of them. There it is again, the word "last"; gosh!
After all of these complaints, I have to admit how wonderful the last five years have been. I have heard from some of my friends about the regrets they have regarding their universities. I am among the lucky ones. I have never ever felt regret about coming to Bilkent. I've had really hard times, but none of them will be remembered badly. Rather, I see them as being informative. Even if I had the chance to stop time and re-do the past, I would want to meet exactly the same people in exactly the same places. To my dearest friends who ask me, "When will you mention us in your column?" this is for you: I am so glad to have met all of you; for all the entertaining times, for all of your support and wisdom; To my dear professors, who came to class with tea, asked about me when I was ill, had fun with us, read my columns and commented, and gave me encouragement. I am also so grateful to the Bilkent News team - Nil, Hande, Chris and all of the others who gave me the opportunity to write here. I have to mention my parents also, who have been so eager to see every hard-copy of my writings and I thank them for all of their support. And you, the one who graduates from Bilkent but are still on campus; I have to thank you also for being the luck of my life.
I want to thank everyone I know because I am growing with you.
Hope to see everyone around!
Take care,
Özlem
Özlem Erdem (IE/IV)
oerdem@ug.bilkent.edu.tr
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