 On Transportation Sexism
“Düzgün otur!" the bus driver barked at me. I stared at him in stunned, indignant disbelief. There I was lounging comfortably in the back row, middle seat, with my spread legs extended down the aisle, not hurting a fly, not encroaching on anyone's space and a man was telling me to sit properly? You must be kidding me, I thought.
I was wearing leggings, so I was definitely not giving the man an inappropriate peep-show. I was neither sticking my feet in anyone's face nor putting anyone in danger. I was just sitting.
Has this ever happened to you?
I do not know what triggered this bus driver's reaction. Perhaps he was just having a bad day and felt the need to lash out. Perhaps not. Maybe he was just annoyed that I was not sitting how he thought a proper young lady ought. I have the inkling that had I been a boy the bus driver would not have said a word.
I think it's a prime example of sexism in the Turkish bus system.
Now stay with me here. Back in the early 1900s when racism was rampant in the United States, inequality between blacks and whites was expressed with the phrase "separate but equal." We all know of the time when Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat to a white man on a segregated bus in 1955; it is rumored to have triggered the Montgomery Bus Protest. Today it seems to me like a similar separation exists here in Turkey. This separation is more voluntary, a bit culturally inbred and between men and women.
Public buses are fascinating. The next time you have the chance, pay attention to the dynamic between women and men. Women sit next to women while men sit next to men, except when a woman knows a man, in which case they may sit next to each other. Many times if there is an open seat next to an individual, a newcomer of the opposite sex will prefer to stand instead of sitting down.
I have had men apologize when taking a seat next to me! Why, exactly? For breaking some inexplicable social code? If the poor guy needs to sit, why should he need to apologize to me when I'm not making use of the other seat?
Taxi cabs are just as interesting.
I was told by my family members to never sit in the front seat; however, I constantly see men sitting in the front seat next to the drivers. Is it a matter of femininity and lady-like actions? Is it sexism?
Some of you may respond by saying these behaviors are safety precautions. My response to this would be that no man will make an inappropriate move in a public, moving vehicle, especially when there is a security guard present as there often is. It's just plain stupid. Similarly, if a taxi driver is out to hurt me he will find a way whether or not I am sitting in the front seat.
Girls, if you can't handle sitting next to a strange man for a handful of minutes in a public setting, why do you even bother going out?
There can be no true social equality in Turkey if simple things like this do not change, if people do not become more integrated. I am not calling for any radical reforms. I don't want to be embarrassed by any more bus drivers in public scenarios. I don't want to get into trouble with strangers any more than you do. But women, next time a man sits next to you in a public setting, don't react like he's a diseased animal or a criminal acting in a grossly indecent manner. He's simply someone's son, husband, or brother looking for a place to sit. And men, same goes for you. Don't act like sitting next to a woman-stranger is some newfound idea!
Who knows, if the individual to your left or right looks like an upstanding citizen, why not even smile and say hello?
By Okþan Alpdemir (IR/III)
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