By CÜNEYT YILMAZ (ECON/II)
cuneyt_y@ug.bilkent.edu.tr

I resemble Boris Yelnikoff in Woody Allen's Whatever Works in many ways. He isn't a likable guy. Me neither. He hates most people. Count it done. He was considered for a Nobel Prize. I, too, feel like there is a Nobel Prize out there, waiting for me to get it one day. So, in any other world, we could have easily been born as Siamese twins; it wouldn't surprise me. But we aren't living in an ideal world, right? (That also explains why there are lots of girls out there who like Robert Pattinson.) And that's why that old grumpy guy can live on his own without having to share his flat with someone else while I can't - well he could have not accepted Melodie if he didn't like her. It isn't fair to be obliged to share my room with a roommate just because I can't afford it otherwise.
I can see you guys chomping at the bit wondering why I'm talking about this. Well, that is because if everything works out fine, I will be in Portugal next semester as an Erasmus Exchange Student. So for that, I've been looking for a place to stay. I've joined a website that enables you to find a flat or a roommate (or both) according to your criteria. It's a simple website; you create a profile with the necessary information, which is, in my case, something like this:
Roommate's Info: Cüneyt, 21 years old, Male, Student.
And wait until any offers pop out; which is, in my case, something very much like this:
Area: Odivelas
Rent: €180 per Month(s), €42 per Week
Roommate's info: Maria, 33yrs old, Female, Professional
I know, I know, my name doesn't make the first impression of a Brad Pitt, but I'm not looking for an Angelina Jolie either (plus, I wouldn't break up with Jennifer Aniston anyways). But I think I deserve something better than that. I mean, 33 years old, come on!
The generation gap that Portuguese people seem to ignore isn't the only problem we have. Take, for example, this one:
Area: Encarnação
Rent: €400 per Month(s)
Roommate's info: This user is a landlord and doesn't live in the property
Comments: Alugo quarto grande com janela por a 2 jovens colegas estudantes de preferência rapazes? Mobilado com 2 camas individuais, enorme roupeiro de parede, cómoda, estante e secretária. Apartamento com...
I don't understand any of the comments above but wonder: it says "comments," right? Why do you ask a question then (I'm assuming that they have the same punctuations as we do)? Who are you? Socrates?
Area: Ajuda
Rent: €275 per Month(s)
Roommate's info: This user is a landlord and doesn't live in the property
Comments: - apartamento totalmente mobilado e remodelado - vistas fantasticas sobre o rio Tejo - persianas electricas…
Obviously, people who invented the Portuguese language were inspired by Olympic Flag, because I haven't seen as much "o"s anywhere else. Still, I don't understand any of the comments, though some look familiar. "Apartamento," hmm. A party? Then that explains "fantasticas" too. Someone should tell Portuguese people that there are other languages on earth other than Portuguese, like English. Some of them, actually, seem to be aware of that fact, like Joao, but they do have problems too. Have a look:
Area: Graça
Rent: €300 per Month(s), €69 per Week
Roommate's info: Joao, 26 yrs old, Couple, Student, Non Smoker
Comments: We are a young Portuguese couple (23 and 28 years old) with a very nice room to rent in the center of Lisboa! Within 5 to 10 minutes walking distance you have Bairro Alto, Baixa-Chiado, Rossio...
You might be a nice, young couple but I can see where this is going. … So no, thanks.
All I expected was something like this:
Area: Closest to Universidade Nova de Lisboa
Rent: You don't have to pay anything at all
Roommate's info: Phoebe, 21 yrs old, Female, Student, Non Smoker
Comments: I love Friends too.

Is it too much to ask for someone like that?